Friday, March 18, 2011

Perhaps Love

Perhaps love is a balance
Sometimes bitter sometimes sweet
It's a cycle, it's there to help us grow
When the sun is out, the rainbow appears
Beautiful sight, refreshing breeze
If we could put through the rain and pain

Perhaps love is a test
When problems arise, we figure out the solutions
There is no right or wrong answers
Only compliments and forgiveness
Patience and acceptance

Perhaps love is a guidance
When we are lost and lonely
When we are confused and coiled
The memory of love will bring us home
The memory of love will see us through

Below is a song by John Denver that was written for his wife. The song says it all.






(Placido Domingo)
Perhaps love is like a resting place
A shelter from the storm
It exists to give you comfort
It is there to keep you warm
And in those times of trouble
When you are most alone
The memory of love will bring you home

(John Denver)
Perhaps love is like a window
Perhaps an open door
It invites you to come closer
It wants to show you more
And even if you lose yourself
And don't know what to do
The memory of love will see you through

(Placido Domingo)
Oh, Love to some is like a cloud
To some as strong as steel

(John Denver)
For some a way of living
For some a way to feel

(Placido Domingo)
And some say love is holding on
And some say letting go
And some say love is everything
And some say they don't know

(John starts joined by Placido)
Perhaps love is like the ocean
Full of conflict, full of change
Like a fire when it's cold outside
Thunder when it rains
If I should live forever
And all my dreams come true
My memories of love will be of you

(Placido Domingo)
And some say love is holding on
And some say letting go

(John Denver)
And some say love is everything
Some say they don't know

(John starts joined by Placido)
Perhaps love is like the ocean
Full of conflict, full of change
Like a fire when it's cold outside
Or thunder when it rains
If I should live forever
And all my dreams come true
My memories of love will be of you


J

Monday, February 28, 2011

Blessed - 33IDC 2010

This post will mark the start of a new series of posts, talking about the various blessings we have in life (notable, about my life). Watch out for new posts!

It has been almost 1 year since I wrote the post Melancholia (April 2010). That time, it was almost the time for me to come back to Malaysia, having finished my final thesis, and waiting for my results. At that time, the final visit to UK (and meeting Yizhen for the first time) has made a realise the importance of having great friends around me.

Over the 4 years when I was in Germany, I didn’t take the chance to make more friends, locking myself up in the room most of the time. I took my time to play lots of games online, notably the World of Warcraft. Over there I has made myself a great and supportive group of friends, a friendship that lasts even until today. In any case, the years I had been through in German wasn’t exactly rosy memory for me, because of the lack of opportunities to actually go outside and do something meaningful for myself and the society (also because I didn’t exactly go out and look for it).

I packed up my bags and finally came back to Malaysia for good in June 2010.

A New Beginning
After I am back in my homeland, where the people and things that matters to me in the heart are, I vowed to not be the same me over the 4 years I was in Germany. I vowed to take up all kinds of opportunities I am going to have, and to constantly improve myself in order to reach new height, and to achieve my life goal: Making this world a better place to live in, one step at a time.

So, I got myself involved in lots of meaningful activities over the past few months.

INCOVAR Dhamma Camp
Firstly it was the 33rd INCOVAR Dhamma Camp as part of the publicity team. I may be new in the team, but the team members (Xiao Thoong, Catherina Chan, Jacyln, and Yee Kuan) were very very supportive of each other, making the job much more bearable despite us having to rush to lots of universities and colleges go do out promotion. Despite not hitting the KPI of 60 members, we felt satisfied with our results (45 people). I would say that it’s a blessing in disguise, because that was just about the right balance between enough people to make noise, and getting each participant to know everyone else in the camp.

Then there was the counseling course, which started in the end of September, and will last till the second week of May. I have learned a lot about helping out others in need through the course. Through the course, I have learned more about my natural inclination in doing things. It also enabled me to ponder more about the direction I am to bring and steer my life to later in my life. (Those of you who are closer to me would have hints about that already)

In any case, it was as much a learning journey as for the participants. There is much satisfaction to be gained from seeing the participants’ faces going from moody to bright and sunny in the fours days of the camp. Also, the bond amongst the participants and between the committees and them that have formed throughout the camp really touched my heart. Who would have known that we can be this close during the camp, and the bond persists even after the camp.

The main highlight of the camp is, of course, the visit to the Rumah Sinar Harapan in Kuala Kubu Bharu. Seeing the patients there for the first time arouses feelings of sympathy, initially. The state and conditions they are in was by no means. However, it is their plight and physical deformities that has caused me to reflect more on life. Having thought of it over and over again, I believe sympathy is the last thing we should feel of them. They are there, oblivious to the outside world, living in their own world... contented. It is they who taught me about the value of being contented with what we have, and to be happy with our lives, no matter how hard it is...

I have also gotten to know many more circles of friends who are supportive of each as Kalyana Mitras. Also, it is through the camp that I have gotten myself active in Twitter and using it as a motivational tool. Who would have throughout that having people wishing each other Good morning with motivational phases each morning would be such an inspiration to go through each day with a great and positive outlook?

In any case, I believe that I have made the right decision to come back to Malaysia. As I have said earlier, it is the people who mattered to me who have brought back the colours and happiness into my life. For this, I am deeply grateful!

I’ll talk about my counseling course in the next post, which will be post… when I have the mood to actually write again…

In any case, I wish all of you well and happy always. Do well in life, and always remember that there is a silver lining to each dark cloud out there!

See Hua

Monday, February 07, 2011

We can!

If you think you are beaten, you are
If you think you dare not, you don't
If you'd like to win, but think you can't
It's almost a cinch you won't
Life's battles don't always to
To the stronger or faster man;
But soon or late the man who wins
Is the one who thinks he can
--Anon

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

The Chicken and the Duck

It is the relationship anniversary of a couple, in a time so long ago that we can't imagine when. Anyway, back to this couple. They were celebrating their anniversary with loving hugs, light kisses and a sumptious romantic lunch near to a lake. They happilly chit-chatted their way through half the afternoon, before deciding to take a walk around the lake.

As they were slowly strolling their romantic way through the park, they heard a sound:

"Quack, quack," it goes.

***
I'll pause here to let you guys figure out what it is.

Now now, it doesn't have to be that long... 5 more seconds

5...

4...

3...

2...

1...

Got an idea of what it is? Yes? let's move on with the story, and find out what it is

***
The lady exclaimed, "Oh, I heard a chicken!"

Dismayed at the statement, our young gentleman corrected her, "No, my dear, it's a duck."

Thinking she is right, she retorted "No! It is definitely a chicken!"

"Quack quack," the sounds goes again.

Not wanting to give up, our gentleman hit back, "There, it's a duck! No chicken ever goes 'quack, quack!'"

"It's a chicken!"

"No, it's a duck! D. u. c. k. duck!"

... The argument went on for a while ...

Finally, teary eyes, the lady said "But, but, it's a chicken..."

Seeing the teary eyes, our gentleman finally saw the light, "Yes dear, it's a chicken."

Happy again that they finally agreed on something, they walk, hand in hand, toward the sunset.

"Quack, quack!"

***
So what is it? A duck, or a chicken? That we will never know. if you think it's a duck, it's a duck. if you think it's a chicken, chicken it is then. It is said that we can never be right and correct at the same time. We can be right, but not correct, as seen in the argument. Or, we can be correct, but not right, as seen in our gentleman's decision to yield. What matters is our priorities, which, in this case, means getting the animal right, or the relationship going.

Lesson of the month (December): We can never be correct and right at the same time.
Teary eyes is the best way to get guys to agree with you.

Source: How to Win Friends and Influence People -Dale Carnegie
Ajahn Brahm's anecdote during his talk "How to survive relationships"

Sunday, May 09, 2010

Melancholia

These few days, I was and am feeling pretty down with a melancholic feeling. I guess it was the time in London that has reminded me of much of my sweet memories of the past, of being able to spend lots of quality time just chatting the night away with my closest friends.

I guess all the time that I have spend way too much time over here in Germany alone, more than 4 years to be exact. While I also have German friends, they are never the same with my close friends who are now scattered all over the world, with their own business to deal with. 

I so miss the times when I was doing my A-levels in INTEC. That time, even if my schedule was sometimes hectic at times, being with my friends totally made up for it. That time, we ate together, laughed together, studied together, went for outings together, and chatted away the night until sunrise together. Needless to say I savored and enjoyed almost every moment of it. To add to that, I have also met Jen in INTEC as well.

It has been quite a number of years since I left INTEC, and embarked on a journey to Germany to continue my studies and get my first degree. The experience has been unpleasant at the least. I have not been able to integrate myself properly into the society here, and have spend most of my times alone. Having most of my best friends from the other programs in INTEC didn't help as well, since I am not close to all of them. 

The experience can be considered as harrowing at the very least. I realized that I have not been the ultra optimistic and happy-go-lucky person that I was in INTEC. It is said that loneliness can eat away one person slowly from the inside. I became moody, and became settled down with depression. The worst part of it is, I have lost my optimism totally. Any kind of advise that I get, I counter with probable negative results and why it can't be done. I probably shouldn't be surprised if I ended up with no friends now...

They say that true friends will stick around through bright and dark times. I have my friends to thank for sticking with me all this while. You guys were fantastic in your support. There are almost always ears to for me to speak into when I need it the most. I may have lost my mind if not for you, and probably somewhere in the netherworld already. Well, here's my big thanks! Thanks to all of you for being there! Thanks for everything!

Special mention to Jen, for still sticking around despite all my negativity, and for being there to push me up, and for lending an ear whenever I need to sleep, despite her heavy schedule. Well, you just see, I am going to be better than the 1 million guys in the line!

Before I end this post, here's a particularly sweet song by Kymm and JJ that happened to one of my favourite songs at the end of my time in INTEC:


Cheers,
seehua

Saturday, May 01, 2010

Hardware Accelerated Adobe Flash Plugin for OSX

After using OSX for one and a half years now, there is one thing that I notice. The Macbook tends to get very hot while watching Flash videos (YouTube and Vimeo are two popular sites that use Flash technology) and while visiting Flash heavy sites (Fashion sites, I am looking at you!). Apparently, it is Apple's reluctance to provide low level APIs to the GPU that causes this problem. The current version of Flash decodes video using the CPU. This method is taxes the CPU heavily, and thus making the Macbook able to fry some eggs while I watch Susan Boyle proving Simon Crowell wrong over and over and over again...

The good news is, Apple has provided just that API along with the OS X 10.6.3 update some weeks ago,. Adobe took advantage of that update, and has provided a beta of Flash Player 10.1 Gala for public testing.

Once I know of this, I immediately downloaded this version, installed it, and use my (still favourite) Firefox for a spin in YouTube. Well, I have a positive feeling about this. CPU usage dropped, and my thighs aren't charred while watching the videos. While Adobe said that it won't be go out as part of the Flash Player 10.1 release, I eagerly await the final, refined release. Until then, I will continue to use this beta version.

CJ

Friday, April 30, 2010

Living Here and Now: Reboot?

It has been quite some time since I last updated this blog. During this time, I was busy with my thesis, preparing for my final two papers in my examinations, being depressed and being happy.  Yea, it has been quite a semester for me.

As of now, I am busy looking for places to do my masters (somewhere bigger than Aalen, hopefully). While doing this, I am also trying to clear my huge backlog of articles in my RSS feeds, spamming around in ReCom, and designing a new interface for ReCom Wiki.

Life has been pretty good to me so far, with many of my old and newly found friends being so supportive on many of my predicaments and being patient while listening to my rantings. (A big salute and thank you to the all of you out there!)

Anyway, to the main issue of this post. I will be doing a reboot of this blog, and hopefully, I will again be able to post regularly in topics ranging from local and international hot issues, computer tips, politics, discussions in ReCom, and my own musings on random things that always seemed to pop up in my head. I have always wanted to be able to  communicate my points properly to the others by speech and words, so it is my aim to improve myself in this aspect by writing and posting stuffs here again. If there is anything that you would like to comment on, feel free to do so =)

It is good to be back again, hope you guys will enjoy reading what I have to say all over again!

seehua